Everything is such a fog. But it’s in the first few days after she passed and I slowly, start to emerge from the depth of absolute despair back into the world where you need to brush your teeth. The nasty realization hits me; she is really really gone.
All I could do at that time was sit in meditation and watch my brain swirl with: ifs and buts the rights and the wrongs. The guilt OH the guilt.
Is this world really real? I want to dissolve into the lights and be with her. Where is she? I want to be light. I want nothing more in this world but to know she’s ok. What is she now? Where is she now?
My Flower puppy
It was at this time that I would sit for hours as I couldn’t do much else, I started to see Pink light just hovering over my right side. Sometimes it felt like it was a pink Lotus flower. And it felt like her quiet presence of comfort.
She was a gentle soul, my Tara girl.
Sometimes, the pink light was accompanied by a Green light on my left side and that felt like gentle strength.
She was a strong soul, my Tara girl.
Time lost its meaning…
I have no recollection of how long I would sit surrounded by these light appearances, before my western brain kicked into analyzing what is actually happening…
But I don’t care I know it’s her I need it to be her…
I can’t, I can’t brush my teeth… not yet…
but I think I can paint a nail set.
My Flower puppy girl…
is a Green Tara on a Pink Lotus
🐾🌺🐾
